get a guy to ask you out

How to Get A Guy To Ask You Out

“How do you get a guy to ask you out? The thing to remember here is that guys like to think that they are in control. How do you make it seem like his idea? Hmmm…… Well, Coco has thought up a few strategies to deploy to leave him thinking that he is running the show!”

ask you outGuys love the thrill of the chase. Many guys become less interested when they are being pursued as it is no longer a challenge. Thankfully, us gals are much smarter operators than the fellas. Try some of these tricks:

Let him know that you are available

Some guys are clueless. He may not realize that you are single. Mention within his hearing, if possible, that you are single. If he knows you, he may well think that you are still with your ex. If he doesn’t know you well, he may just assume that you have a boyfriend. A lot of guys assume that all hot babes are taken. Guys who have been single for a while tend to throw in the towel and start thinking there is no girl out there for him.

Get his attention

This is a pretty simple strategy but it is one that many girls overlook. He will never ask you out if he hasn’t noticed you. Sadly, for whatever reason, you may have fallen under his radar. How do you get his attention? Well, guys look first, and ask questions later. So you have to make sure that you are always looking your finest around him. Play up your best features.

If he is someone you know reasonably well or possibly work with, ensure that you start to fall within his vision. Start casually appearing when he is around for coffees, lunches, or drinks.

If the guy is a virtual stranger, for example from the gym, start going to the gym at the same time as him. Always smile and start off with a simple “Hi”. He will soon start to notice you if you are making yourself pleasant and friendly. Don’t be overly familiar or you may creep him out.


Once you start moving into his periphery the next thing to do is to start flirting. Some guys pick up on the flirting thing faster than others. The self confident guy will pick up on it in a flash. The guy who lacks in self esteem or has been single for a while may take longer to pick up on the signals. He may well assume that you are actually flirting with someone else, or assume that he is misreading you. In this case, just keep persevering, sooner or later he will realize that you are flirting with him.

The best flirting gestures are smiling, and playing with your hair, neck and throat. Subconsciously he will pick up on your signals and often before he realizes it he will be flirting right back at you. Signals for reciprocated flirting include the guy who starts to run his fingers through his hair, or rubs his nose, or plays with his tie. Putting his hands in his pockets with his fingers pointing to his groin is the strongest signal of them all. Let nature takes its course. He is now interested on some level and will start to pursue you.

Make subtle suggestions

If you know the guy perhaps you can start making vague suggestions about getting together in a group. If you have mutual acquaintances, perhaps you can all be included in a relatively innocent activity together. Other subtle suggestions about maybe getting together sometime for a coffee can be perceived as relatively non aggressive.

Take advantage of opportunities

Is he drinking a coffee on his own? Why not take the plunge and ask if you can sit with him while you drink yours? You never know, he may have engineered sitting by himself as a silent invite for you to join him.

If an opportunity presents itself, take it. You don’t know how long it will be before the next one comes up.

If you are out with your friends and you see him somewhere, give him a little wave and a smile. He may well come over, invite him to join you for a drink. Take the long way back from the ladies (when you have checked that your lipstick isn’t smeared and your mascara hasn’t run) and make sure you walk right past him and his group. He may well call you over to chat. If he is all over a girl, keep walking.

Recruit your friends

ask you out 2What are friends for? No, I’m not talking about playground tactics of “Did you know that she likes you?”. Use a bit of discretion. Get them to start playing detective to make sure he really is single and not some creepy sociopath. Encourage your friends to arrange a party or get together where he can somehow be invited as well.

You can get a guy to ask you out. Just remember, most guys like to think they are in control. Guys love the thrill of the chase. Don’t appear desperate and dateless. Guys love a bit of a challenge. Let him know that you are available and friendly. Don’t forget, that with guys, appearances count for a lot to start with. Get in his line of vision when you are looking your absolute best.

Go for it. He will ask you out!

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…all the best,

Billy Baker

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